What candy hearts can teach you about the divorce process

On behalf of Furr & Cohen, P.A. posted in Divorce on Friday, February 14, 2014.

Many of our readers are likely familiar with so-called conversation hearts. These small candies are most frequently sold around Valentine’s Day. They tend to sport romantic words and phrases such as, “Be Mine,” “Love,” “Kiss Me,” and “Crazy 4U.” These little candies may strike individuals going through a divorce as understandably obnoxious. However, putting a spin on these little candies may actually help you navigate your divorce with grace and dignity.

These candies are small. Therefore, their messages must be concise, to the point and must be at least somewhat inspiring. After all, few people would want to have a Valentine’s conversation with someone who presents them with a candy that says, “Hi, I Guess,” or “Whatever.” Most of what you need to keep at the forefront of your mind during the divorce process can be similarly distilled down to eye-catching, brief and meaningful phrases.

For example, “Be True” is an excellent phrase to keep with you at all times during the divorce process. Shakespeare reminds us, “To thine own self be true.” What do you need to do in order to uphold your true self during the divorce process? Which arguments are worth having and which are beneath your time and energy? What do you most value and what do you hope for yourself in the future? Thinking “Be True” as you move forward will help you refine your approach.

In addition, “You Can” is another great candy-heart phrase to keep in mind right now. Divorce can be a draining process. Reminding yourself of your capacity for positive change and growth can be a powerful energizer. Don’t be afraid to turn candy hearts on their heads this season. This idea just might help keep you grounded during an otherwise tumultuous time.

Source: Jeff Landers, “Candy ‘Candy ‘Conversation Hearts’ For Divorcing Women On Valentine’s Day,” Forbes, Feb. 11, 2014